and if our paths never cross again, the memory will last a lifetime.

me.. writing about romantic feelings? who would’ve thought.

i lost myself in the pages of romance novels because my own love life would never compare. or the lack there of. for years i imagined romance only existed in the ink of the pages i tore through every night.

i didn’t know it existed in the brown of his eyes or the way his smile grew as he spoke about his experience of the world. i didn’t expect my heart to race when he called me “baby” and i definitely didn’t expect to hear him saying “you’re beautiful” on a loop in my head for a month after.

he left his mark on me and lit a fire in my heart that made me want to search for fleeting moments of romance in the whirlwind of life. i romanticise the drink he ordered at the bar and taste the whiskey on his lips when im falling asleep at night. he is the the type of person i could write endless words about but none of them could ever capture the poem he is.

fate is a funny thing to consider. that the universe already had a plan before i even had the experience of life to consider all of the endless possibilities. but i do believe it was fate. at a time when i felt nobody could ever touch my heart, there he was. not only touching the side of my face as he kissed me, not only touching the top of my collarbone as he pulled my dress strap down, not only when he held my hand but when he asked me what i want from life. when he asked me about my parents and the city i grew up in. he touched my heart in a way i won’t ever be able to say thank you for.

he is my secret. i don’t want to share him with the world. i don’t want to tell my friends how a guy i hardly knew knocked my world off its axis. how do you begin to explain that those little moments in a foreign city, with someone who was a stranger to me not too long ago, completely ripped me to shreds and glued me back together?

“don’t give me those eyes” he said before everything happened. and i will forever wonder if anybody will ever see my eyes the way he did.